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Friday, August 12, 2016

                                                The Switch
I’m in a game I shoot, I score,  I run too fast and  I hit my head, I'm paralyzed my head is as sore as running into a pole.I wake up and I look in the shiny mirror it is as shiny as a diamond.I look at myself and I say is this actually my body or what? I have abs as big as  soccer balls.I look behind me there's walls as grey as the sky on a rainy day. My bed is as flash as a new bed that's been just bought.I run down the bumpy stairs.I get down the stairs and this beautiful lady gives me shiny gold keys for a car.I get to the big garage it is as big as a house.I see a flash car it is as shiny as gold but I'm confused because I can't drive. I turn on the car and I try to drive  but I press too hard on the ignition and I crashed the beautiful car but  I kept on driving to football practice.I got to the huge football field it was as big as a school.I saw all my mates practicing so I started to practice too it was only 1 day until the big game so I practised all night.It was the day and I was pumped up.I got to the stadium and it was 20min away until the game started .
The game was  going to start in 30sec.The game is starting.The ball goes in front of me and the other Cridon Renedo dives for the ball and then we donk our heads and we switch back to our same self.I helped the ball boy up and we kept on playing. I am glad I won my game.

The End

4 comments:

  1. Selamat,Talia I am really like you describing words the really hook me in. I also realized that you used a simile. Your writing really hooks me in and I really enjoyed it. Maybe next time you could work on putting a space after a full stop. If you have the time please visit my blog here is the link
    http://coriannak102015.blogspot.co.nz/

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi Talia. My name is Llewellyn.
    Great Switch Story and punctuation. You did really well.
    This reminds me of story writing in Syndicate 1 and 2.
    You should work on putting spaces after doing full stops.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Kia Ora Llewellyn thank you for posting on my blog I will work on spaces in my work.I will visit your blog soon.
    Taila

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi Talia My name Is Jazmine From Mamaku Hub At Greymain School.
    Your Switch story is great and it has full stops and capital letters in it. You have a lot of punctuation in it.
    It Reminds me the time I had to do a story.
    Bye Jazmine Is Mamaku Hub

    ReplyDelete

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